Now, I've got a cousin on my daddy's side
He was a single boy and doin' fine
Until he met a widder who took him for a ride
He's a hubby now besides the poll of nine

All of the monkeys ain't in the zoo
There's some runnin' loose around me and you
Just watch when you're in a crowd and you'll agree too
That all of the monkeys ain't in the zoo

Oh, the women on a budget always tickle me
They're a tight as ticks and worry all the time
And then a travelling salesman sweeps 'em off their feet
They give a dollar for a brush that's worth a dime

All of the monkeys ain't in the zoo
There's some runnin' loose around me and you
Just watch when you're in a crowd and you'll agree too
That all of the monkeys ain't in the zoo

Now, there's some awful smart men that run the USA
They head the list of some of our great men
And then there's some others who had a big shot brother
They weren't elected, they were just put in

All of the monkeys ain't in the zoo
There's some tellin' us what we can do
Just watch when you're in a crowd and you'll agree too
That all of the monkeys ain't in the zoo

I used to tell my girl when she'd get marryin' on her mind
That she'd never make a monkey out of me
But I was just a country kid and I didn't know the game
And I guess you know what happened to me

All of the monkeys ain't in the zoo
There's some runnin' loose around me and you
Just watch when you're in a crowd and you'll agree too
That all of the monkeys ain't in the zoo